I could care less.

Perhaps it's been an annoying sort of week, hence I'm annoyed and angry. I promise it won't always be this way... I'm usually a pretty happy person, believe it or not.

Here are some examples of things that have annoyed me this week... phrases that should be banned.

1. I could care less.
If you could care less, then you must care some. What you mean to say is you couldn't care less. That means that right now, you care the least amount that you possibly could, hence you could not possibly care any less.

2. Bless your heart.
This is a southern-ism. It sounds harmless... even sweet, right? Wrong. What it really means is "Wow, are you stupid!" For example... "Oh, you made the coffee today? Bless your heart." That does not mean "thank you" for making the coffee. It means "Don't you know how to make coffee? This is the worst coffee I've ever had! Wow, are you stupid!" Now you know. Don't be fooled!

3.Going forward.
Instead of what? Going backward? Riiiiight.

4. No offense, but...
Um, this means that person is about to offend you. Why say this? It doesn't make the next words any less insulting. "No offense, but this logo looks like my cat threw up all over it." Oh, OK, great. None taken. Thanks for saying "no offense" because it magically created a shield around me through which no insults can penetrate. Thanks for protecting my feelings... JERK. No offense.


Do you have pet peeves like this? Or funny corporate jargon? I once had a boss who thought "jettison" meant "do it FAST" when it really means "to throw away." Hehe... "Sarah, jettison those designs for the website." OK, yep, I'll toss 'em!

Ahhh... onward to a better week! I wish you all a good one!

Just spend like an hour on it.

Don't get me wrong, I LOVE doing design work for friends and friends of friends. And when I can, I try to do it cheap-ish - or free - especially if it's for charity or something.

But sometimes, I just don't have the time/energy/money/patience to do freebees.... especially for acquaintances. Here's what irks me. Example conversation:

Friend of a friend of a friend: So, I need some design work done.

Me: OK, great! What do you need?

FFF: I need a logo. I want it to incorporate a running person, but abstract and a lightning bolt that symbolizes "ideas" and I want the lightning bolt to fade into the background. I like blue, orange and purple. And can you use that font that Martha uses on her blog? I just want it to be really simple.

Me: Um, OK... I can probably figure something out.

FFF: How much would that cost?

Me: Well, my rate is $XX per hour. I can get you a quote.

FFF: Oh, well OK... can you just spend like an hour on it then? That would be great, thanks.

*sigh*

I love design, but c'mon folks.

It's "Make the Logo Bigger" Day. Can you make the logo bigger? Nope, BIGGER. It's not big enough. I'd like to see it bigger, please. DO IT!

Oh, how I love "Make the Logo Bigger" Days.

... or not.

Um, I CAN make it bigger (as in, I am able), but it will take over the ENTIRE thing. Oh, that's what you want? Well OK then. Awesome.